Alive.

I've decided to public my blog once again, don't ask me why, I can't figure out the reason either. Don't ask me why I private it for the past few days or maybe even a week, because I won't answer. I guess I just wanted an outlet to vent out all my thoughts that I feel that it's not exactly appropriate for others to know, only my close friends will know what has been going on in my life lately. Of course if you are wondering what exactly happened to me, I can only say it was the toughest period of my life. Everything felt so wrong, everything felt so unreal. I thought I will just lose myself.  What I can say is, I managed to survive with the help of my close friends, who never gave up on me although I know some of them are running low on their patience.

I'm mos thankful to the group of people who stayed by my side during these past few days, supporting me in every single way that they can. Without them, I guess I will still be doing what I've been doing.. I'm sorry for hurting them and I hope it's not too late to realize that I've made a wrong and bad move. I made a promise, and I will make sure I keep to it and will never break it. It will be tough for me in the first place, but that doesn't mean I will resort back to that method again. I will try, I will control and I won't give up! :) I don't want to hurt those who care about me anymore, and I certainly don't want to see them going all worried for me, that's not how I should love them. If I love them, I should stop. It's time for me to break away from everything that have been binding me and taking away the happiness that I should feel. I shall not bury myself in unwanted thoughts anymore.

I will hang in there, just like that little hamster in the picture.